Do you
a) carry on regardless - who cares, the pheromones are raging;
b) carry on, accepting the hit however many times it happens because there's nobody else around;
c) run away - you can only repress the rage for so long?
d) something else
Friday 26 June 2009
Yet another Friday Conundrum
You've spent a pleasant evening (or extended period of time) with someone you think might make you happy. Suddenly, his or her response to something you say indicates that s/he has absolutely no comprehension of your outlook, philosophy, ideology or whatever you want to call it.
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13 comments:
Chloroform.
Reminds me of the old chat-up line:
Does this old rag smell of chloroform to you love?
I have run away from many a Liverpool/Chelsea fan.
I have deliberately started on many a Liverpool fan which resulted in a lifetime ban from football at sixth form, luckily I was allowed a reprive only to start another brawl.
Firstly, REALLY Emma?! I seem to recall you dating at least one Liverpool fan, can't recall any Chelsea ones to be fair though. Oh, it's a tricky one today, I have to confess I dated a Tory voter once and had an on/off fling with one during sixth form (but to be fair I went to public school at that stage and all the boys were Tory!), in both cases we had plenty in common aside from that and the fiery political debates made things interesting shall we say. ;-) The closest I've come to experiencing what you describe is with a friend I'd known for years, who suddenly one day came out with a load of racist stuff (Emma you know to whom I refer)which really shocked me, I'd had no idea, but yes I gave him a piece of my mind and we parted company soon after. I'd say stick to your principles, and be clear in your mind of the line you wouldn't cross, but if the other party is open enough to discuss things and hear your arguments and concede some points whilst agreeing to disagree then it may still work. If not, run away, run away, as fast as your little legs will carry you!
Don't stress about it and enjoy the raging hormones. You could always:
(a) Ask them if they feel the ideological differences are a problem/insurmountable barrier to a happy future together.
(b) Have hours of fun trying to convert them to your way of seeing the world.
(c) Join the nearest monastery, for cold baths and flagellation.
I'd turn it into a confrontational moment. Would it make it easier than the awkward moments to come before any romantic (if that were the case) interlude. I could live with that, more so if I won the argument.
I think it depends on what she said. If it was something racist, that would put me right off. Even if she was really hot I'd have to just leave. If she was a bit Tory it wouldn't necessarily stop me enjoying the evening or perhaps a short fling, but that would probably be it.
I went on a couple of dates with a girl at university. She took me back to her room and there was an open Bible with page markers by her bed and posters with quotes from the Bible on the walls. I made my excuses and left straight away. At the time I was a pretty anti-religious physics student, thought the whole idea of believing in a god was primitive, repressive and caused pointless conflict around the world. She was a biology student too! However, after travelling and living in other countries I'm now a bit more open minded, so I probably wouldn't just scarper.
I can't stand not knowing what my significant other is thinking, so I just straight up and ask for a status update. If that doesn't work, I just kiss him. He's easy.
What a moral range is displayed.
This hasn't happened to me in any significant way, though it was inspired by an encounter at my brother's wedding. He knows a lot of posh people, having studied at Cambridge. I was bopping away with a rather glamorous and pleasant individual whom I rather liked, and we got round to the 'what do you do?' conversation. I was waiting for the contempt I'd had all day for being a lecturer rather than lawyer or banker, but it was far worse.
'I write for the Daily Mail', she announced gaily. Not shamefacedly. Not 'I couldn't get anything else' or 'I'm destroying it from within' - she was PROUD. Which means that she's a racist, Tory, anti-science, bigoted moron. I made the lamest of excuses ('I think I left my drink over there') and ran like hell.
What a disappointment. Turns out that she had a bloke anyway, and he writes for The Sun, so clearly they're a nest of evil.
I think I did the right thing. I'd rather be single than swallow my principles than some reactionary's tongue. Though I suspect that as age advances and opportunities reduce, I'll revisit that decision…
Who said that if you are out with someone for the first time and they are nasty to any waiter/waitress/shop assistant person that you might encounter, then they are a nasty person, period? It sounds like a vague rule of thumb, but it actually seems to be a good indication of character.
Good question. My thinkin' is that it depends on the situation obviously but if it ain't right it ain't ever gonna be right. Run.
This all reminds me of the excellent 'Curb Your Enthusiasm', when Larry David finally gets the opportunity to cash in his '10th Anniversary present' of having a fling.
Mid-foreplay he spots a portrait of George W on her dressing table.
"You're a Republican?"
End of.
That's how it should go.
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